Saturday, January 20, 2018

My Response

Today I got a comment for my post "Hesitation" and I decided to respond in this post instead of in the comment section...

Here is what the comment from an Anonymous poster read "ever think it's not all about you.  after all these years, others might be running away from you? curious."~

Well, anonymous...I wonder why you think I think "it's all about me"~ is it because my blog focuses on my thoughts about things...perhaps you are right...the reason that is my perspective is because in your life the only thing you can control is "you"~ so blaming others would just be futile~

In a way~ this IS all about me...I realize that I am not the same person I was when I started this blog and if you read through it you can see my dramatic transformation over the years.  To think others are running away from me~ is almost laughable because in my life...I have been doing the running~ I left my family behind and moved far away to a place I hardly knew anyone~ I stayed with a cousin but even that didn't work out in the end~ and I ended up moving yet again until I was alone~and it wasn't until then~ that I started to change...for the better?  I guess that is just a matter of perspective~

I have learned that physical scars may fade but the emotional ones left never do~ and you can sit around feeling sorry for yourself or you can do something about it~ so my words are all about me~ and how I started to put the pieces of my life back together...and on this adventure I learned to love who I am along the way~ I really believe that you cannot truly love someone else until you learned this very important thing first.

So thinking about it~ YES!~ it is all about me~ and if others decide to run away from me~ there is really nothing I can do about it~ but lately~ they haven't been running away...the ones that truly matter are right by my side~ holding me up...

Curiosity is admirable if it comes from a good place~ but sending hurtful words disguised in a package of curiosity says a lot about about a person~ so I have to wonder ANONYMOUS poster, which describes you..step out of the shadows next time...you have nothing to fear from me~

I hope this answered your question...

Wednesday, January 17, 2018

Hesitation

The cold has settled in, and I am wrapped in a blanket typing this post...my mind really hasn't settled on a topic so this will probably just be me rambling~ so I guess that can be a topic...

Have you ever been a little scared to accomplish something you have been wanting to do for a long time? I have been feeling that way for a while now. 

I have been putting a lot of effort in over coming a major obstacle in my life and I can finally see the finish line just over the next hill~ but instead of running at full force...I have been taking a meandering stroll...trying to enjoy the last bit of freedom before I reach my goal. 

I am starting to second guess my decisions but I keep reminding myself that this is what I wanted to do...now all this hesitation has got me thinking...and everyones knows that can be a dangerous thing...and it all comes down to me really being afraid~ do I take a step forward or do I take a new path~

I know I will figure this out~ I just wish I could see the future just a little bit~ just a glimpse...so I can be more confident in my decision...so I guess it is time to put on the kettle and make some spiced tea~ at least I can stay warm~ even if my thoughts are a little cold...

Monday, January 15, 2018

The Fire

From a distance, you can see the flames as the fire dances seductively over all that you have.  It only takes an instance before everything is gone except the smoldering, scorched earth.

I know, sometimes that isn't enough, just to see something from a distance.  You have to hold back everything that stirs inside of you to walk towards the nothingness~but you still have see what is left...

But instead of running, pause~ allow yourself to hear what's really in your heart so that you can make the right decision for yourself...when facing two roads, always pick the more positive track...you can also put on your dreaming cap and imagine your new world~ visualize your potential and then take action..even though you may never be truly ready you still have to take a step forward~

You see, fire may destroy everything in its path, but it is only temporary.  The scorched land will undergo a series of changes.  Some plants will quickly take hold, gradually changing the landscape.  They will thrive there and slowly everything will return...but you should know that what comes backs may not resemble what was lost...

It is up to you to clear the clutter from your life to create a space for the new.  Stepping away for a moment may give you some perspective or even diving into something you have never done before can shake up things~ but you don't have to do anything...every moment is an opportunity to create the life that want~