My Superpower

You know, I have been going to chat for many years now.  I would call myself a reg even though I may take long breaks between chat sessions.  

I have been on a lot more lately because I am on vacation.  I like to chat when I first wake up and right before I go to bed.  I would say, chat is like my morning wake-me-up and my good book before bed.  

I try not to get mixed up in chat drama but sometimes the circumstances drag you in...because I am a reg, sometimes people look towards me for help.  

I know people but I am not really close to anyone online so I can't really "change" anything.  I can't reverse a ban or ask for one to be repealed (if that is even possible).   

I am just an observer with no real power.  Unless, the power of persuasion works but I don't think that is one of my superpowers.  So all I can do, is guide.  I wish I could help you with more than that but encouragement is all I have to give you right now...

Name Change

I know, your parents picked out your name and you either love it or hate it.  I guess there is an in between place of not really caring one way or the another.

So, if you had the chance, would you change your name?  I thought about this today.  My parents named me Christine but I have always gone by Christie.  I hated that everyone had a different spelling for my name and believe it or not, they hardly ever spell it correctly but would I change it...

For some odd reason, my dad use to called me Crystal. My grandmother called my Crissy and I had a German teacher who called me Kris.  In chat, people call me Cherry so I guess I have had a few names over the years but would I change mine if I had the chance...

I don't think I would, it is a part of who I am and changing even the smallest thing could alter who I see myself as...why would I risk that...but who is to say that you would make the same choice.

So, would you change your name if you had the chance....

Infectious

It starts as a rumble somewhere in the back of your throat. Then grows to a dance that tickles your belly and explodes into spasms that hold you mesmerized just twitching and leaking as the uncontrollable laugh is born.

The reason is never clear as to what exactly triggers the laugh but sometimes it is something so silly, a word or gesture that starts the path.

It doesn't take much and the results are infectious that before long the whole group is wound up in a ball on the floor, gasping for air as the joy of the moment takes hold.

I have heard the saying that "laughter is the best medicine" and I whole-heartily agree that this is the best medicine for me.  Laughing and laughing and laughing some more, brings me to a healing place inside, if only all our troubles could be solve with a gut-wrenching, all consuming uncontrollable laugh...

The Plan

I am a planner.  I not only have a plan but I have a backup plan  incase the original plan gets off track.  I guess you could say I like for everything to fit in a nice little box of predictability but as you know...that is not always possible.

I was 47 minutes in to baking an apple pie when the power went out.  I called the power company to find out that they didn't expect the power to be back on for another 3 hours!  I was expected to bring most of the food to a friends for dinner and I hadn't even started it yet.  What am I suppose to do now?  I never thought that the power would go out, I mean it wasn't like there was a storm or high winds. There was nothing I could do but abandon my original plan. 

The day was nothing like I thought it would be...it was so much better.  We ended up going out to eat and our focus was on the good conversation and not the preparation of the meal.  We went bowling and I bet we laughed way more then what is proper in public.  I ended up finished up the meal when I got home and we had a late meal but it really didn't matter.  I realized that it is the unexpected things in life that make it so enjoyable not the  predictability of it.  

I am still going to plan but I am going to be ok when there is a hiccup it the execution...te solum vivere semel~ you only live once!.

Cherry Christmas

As I open up my eyes and gaze on the new day, I remember the date.  Many Christmases have come and gone, but the feelings of family and love linger on.

 I am transported back to a time of pure excitement to see what was left for me under a tree and I smile, knowing that excitement will be felt by so many young ones today.  I may not feel that childhood excitement but that doesn't mean I don't feel the magic of the day.

I may be alone today but not in my heart.  I am not complaining because I could have been anywhere today surrounded by loving faces but I decided this path.

 I have so much to celebrate because I am surrounded by love.  I am finally moving forward and my past isn't holding me back.

I can say that I am happy and I have learned to live with the choices.  I couldn't have come this far without you...

Merry Christmas

Home Soon

As the holidays quickly approach, please remember those that are far from home.  It is so hard to be away from the ones you love.

Separation is difficult enough without an ocean between you.
Reach out and do as much as you can to help those who are away.

I know why you are gone.  You have a job to do and when that job is over you will have open arms awaiting your return. Until that time, know that I am thinking about you.

 I take some comfort in the stars that shield us all.  They are the path that keeps us connected.  When I miss you, I can just look to heavens for a bit of light, enough hope to know you will be home soon.

Stay safe and be strong...home is in the distance and my heart is with you...

Deck The Wall

My sad attempt at sprucing up a classic carol...

Deck the Wall

Deck the wall with mindless posts
Fa-la-la-la-la, la-la-la-la
'Tis the reason there’s a drunkin’ host
Fa-la-la-la-la, la-la-la-la

Don we now our minds in peril
Fa-la-la, la-la-la, la-la-la.
Trolling chat to should make us sterile
Fa-la-la-la-la, la-la-la-la.

See the hell raising regs before us.
Fa-la-la-la-la, la-la-la-la
Our boo-fucking-hoos are a well-played chorus
Fa-la-la-la-la, la-la-la-la

Follow me in keyboarding pleasure.
Fa-la-la, la-la-la, la-la-la.
While I tell of past chat leisure .
Fa-la-la-la-la, la-la-la-la

Fast away the old whine passes.
Fa-la-la-la-la, la-la-la-la
Hail the new year, lads and lasses
Fa-la-la-la-la, la-la-la-la
Wall reading we enjoy, all together.
Fa-la-la, la-la-la, la-la-la.
Heedless of our ruffed feathers.
Fa-la-la-la-la, la-la-la-la

Happy holidays ya'll and pass the eggnog!

Tokens

Who doesn't like to receive something wrapped in a bow?  

Your heart quickens a little as you strip off the ribbons and shred the paper to find your hidden treasure inside.  I truly believe I enjoy watching the delight tumble about as gifts are revealed.  Giving is much better than receiving.....

The gifts I remember most are the ones that come from the heart.  A picture from a friend miles away, a bag of peppermints that were delivered when I wasn't feeling well, a hand-written letter, and a hand-made jewelry box...these a just a few of my favorite things that meant so much to me.

I am not saying that you shouldn't spend money on people you care about...I am only saying the gift should mean something.  You should feel excited to give gift and not just the excitement of checking off another name from your shopping list.

Embrace the feeling of giving and be thankful when receiving.  Enjoy each other and celebrate with tokens of your caring.

There is a secret to giving the perfect gift..give from your heart and you will never go wrong...

'Tis the Season

When I look around my neighbor, I see the sparkle of Christmas lights and feel the warmth of the season.

 I know that if the world had a holiday illumination all year round that we wouldn't see how special it is.  It would become routine and just fade into the background of life.  Such a sad fate, for such a magical event.

As much as I love to see bright hues and hear the joyous spark of the season, I know they have to be enjoyed in moderation.

There will be a time to pack this all away and settle in to the everyday grind but for now, it is time to open your eyes and see the magic.  It is time to inhale the spirit of giving.  It is time to find the happiness around you...

Infectious

Do you think people are nicer this time of year?  

I have to say that I keep bumping into the nicest of people lately and it really has inspired me to do something good in return.  I am not into grand gestures but little tokens of caring go a long way.

I have found that if you smile and say something pleasant you get that two-fold in return.  I have been adding a little more to my tips and making sure I thank all who do something for me, no matter how small it would seem.  I hug a little more and laugh until I cry and I find that this is all infectious.

You can give negativity to the world and I believe you will get that back in return....but if you give something positive from the heart, no matter how small...you will feel the power of good in world and how nice that can really be...

Jump Me!

The crisp air nipped at my nose as I trudged  through the darken parking lot towards my car.  I had stayed late to wrap up some work and at this point,  I just wanted to get home.

I unlocked the door and slipped behind the steering wheel. I could feel my cold breath against the semi-frozen hands.  I turned the key and the engine whimpered a bit before falling silent...my battery was dead!

What do I do?  I noticed a running car parked across the lot.  This was my answer.  I tapped on the window and peered at bewildered set of eyes as the window slowly opened.

I asked if he could jump me but he didn't have jumper cables.  It was a good thing that I have some in my car. He hooked them up and suggested that I pour a can of cola over the battery to help clear off some of the corrosion when I get home because he believed the battery wasn't getting enough juice.

I smiled and thanked him for his help.  I am sure the cola tip would have worked but I figured I would end up making the problem worse so I just took it to the mechanic.  His diagnosis...the battery was bad...so no cola bath in the world could have fixed my problem....

I have learned that taking shortcuts sometime take longer than the actual path...

Say What You Mean

I haven't been online much this week because real life has a way of dragging you back in...

This has been a pretty crazy week for me but mostly because of a lack of communication with my boss.  I just realized that mind reading is a skill that my superior believes I possess but at las, I do not.

This has lead to a lot of frustrating moments for me because in a tug-a-war of who is right, the balance always tips to the one getting the higher paycheck.  The poorer one ends up re-doing everything to appease the God-like ego baring one.

I like efficiency and working smarter not harder so I have to wrap my head around communicating with someone who doesn't say what they mean but has hidden meaning behind words.

Where is my decoder ring when I need it...

Shine the Light

I had a great time last night.  It has been a awhile since I just went out and danced all night.

 I forgot how alive you feel as you become one with the beat and transcend to another world of rhythm and motion.

I woke up this morning refreshed and ready to tackle my day...then I ran into a hater online.

 Apparently I am so pathetic that I write a blog about chatting.com...ok, this just made me laugh.

 I guess I should be insulted but frankly, this person obviously doesn't get who I am and why I am here and he can think anything he likes.  It still won't change why or what I write about.

If you read my blog from beginning to end, you will see how much I have grown and changed over the years.  I am definitely not the same person I use to be and I think that is a very good thing.  There is so much of who I am that I hold back from this online world because there is no place for it here.

 You only get a glimpse of who people really are here and that has to be enough.  If it is not, then you need to step out from behind the keyboard and shine the light of the real world on things.

I know who I am and I know what it takes for me to be truly happy and they may make me pathetic in your eyes but frankly, I live my life looking though my own lens...

Dance with Me

Have you ever heard a song that you can't get out of your head?  Well, that happened to me today.  It seemed like every time I turned on something that song was playing.

It isn't me usual style of music but there is something about it that moves me.  The song is "Bailando" and I simply cannot get it out of my mind. The song in about dancing and having fun.

 I have decided to learn some latin dancing this weekend as a way of paying homage to this mesmerizing song.  I just watched the video and that is what inspired me to go for it.

I wouldn't say I was a great dancer but I can keep up with the young-ins at the club.  Wish me luck~ and don't forget to play my song..

The Playground

You know, I haven't posted anything new for several days and the pressure of coming up with something interesting to write, well it is starting to get to me.   

I tossed many topics around in my head but nothing seemed good enough to share.  I almost walked away without a new post.  What changed my mind? 

 I decided to sit down and see where my mind went when there were no rules or expectations.  I just started to write and low and behold I ended up here, with you..

I guess it doesn't matter how we got here....just that we have arrived.  Here our adventure begins...I am curious, what is your pleasure...what makes you smile...where would you like me to take you...

Our imagination is our playground...close yours eyes and let the fun begin... 

An Hour

In a few moments, the clock will strike 2AM and it will fall back to 1 AM.  I will gain an extra hour due to daylight savings.  This is a true do-over moment.

What will I do with my extra time?  There are so many possibilities...but I want my hour to be meaningful today.  I don't want to squander it on something reckless or selfish.

If I could do anything with it, I would give it to someone else ...an extra hour to... spend with a loved one...or a lost love...  maybe I would give it to someone who had only a short time left~ one hour is so precious...

I will do my best to make my hour meaningful...What are you going to do with your hour?

Masterpiece

As I was driving to work today, I was taken back by the pink and purple hues of the morning sky. The color palate was so cleverly woven into itself you know it must have been created by a great painting master and I almost didn't notice it at all.

How many times have I driven to work and not given the sky the slightest glance? Why was today so different than the others?  I just happened to look up and the right moment and that one instance changed me.

  Have you noticed that we spend so much of our time living with our heads down?  We are always so busy juggling life and focusing on what is right in front of us that we fail to notice our surroundings.  We simply forget to look up.

There is more around us, so much more.  We just have to take the time to glance upwards so we don't miss the little masterpieces of life so look up my friend...

Addiction

I have noticed that I have been online a little more than usual lately.  I can't really explain why.

I tell myself today is a good day to take a break and the next thing I know I am checking my email...which never stops at just email and before long I am in the middle of a conversation about the top 3 horror films of all time.

I guess online is easier than real life sometimes.  It is easy to say what you want when no one is looking back at you.

I have always been a little shy when it comes to large groups of people.  I prefer to hang out with a small intimate group of friends.

I am not one to really do things (social settings) on my own.  I don't like to go out and eat or even see a movie by myself.  I love to share those things with someone else so I am sure it is not surprising that I like to reach out and strike up a conversation online.

Right now, I don't think I am too concerned with my current online regiment.  I am having fun and I believe I have struck a nice balance between both worlds...I just have to be vigilant not to slip into the addiction again...

Forever Friend

Have you ever noticed that the moon is always there?  You know I love to run, mostly at night.  I have begun to really count on the moon.  

I look up to its constant brightness or dullness depending on the phase.  I like to think that someone else is watching it too.

Someone else is thinking by its light.  I bet a lot of interesting things have been thought under the light of the moon.

I gaze up and think about the possibilities of things.  I wonder if you ever notice the moon and thought that someone else might be looking at it too.

Tonight the moon was hidden by clouds and the wind was brisk.  I felt a little lost as I shivered in the crisp air.
 Even though it was hidden, I knew it was there.  I wanted the clouds to move to show just a glimpse of my forever friend.  

I didn't see the moon tonight but I will be looking for it later.  I hope seeing it will help me feel settled and my thoughts to be clear.  I miss you tonight.  Come find me soon...

Guilty Pleasure

I sure this will not shock you...but I love music.  I really don't have a favorite type of music but I do find myself buying a lot of alternative rock/pop/rock songs.  

I guess my mood determines what I have playing through my speakers/headphones.  When I need to concentrate or do paperwork, I usually listen to classic music.  There is just something about a piano that really relaxes my mind.

When I am browsing or shopping online, I am listening to something with a sick beat.  When  am chatting, I seem to be listening to a lot more classic rock n roll and I think that is because the chatters are posting/linking more classic rock titles.  I enjoy listening to the same song as a bunch of strangers online.  It connects us to together at that moment and makes the moment seem more real.  It is fun.

When I am alone in my car, I usually listen to my cd's.  I guess I am kinda old fashion about that too.  I still buy my music from a real store and get a real disc.  I have downloaded songs but I still like to purchase the disc.  

My favorite part of buying the whole "album" is the drive home.  I crank up the volume and  listen for the chorus of the new songs before I move to the next one.   I have a chance to hear a little bit of every song so that I can complete the new disc before I get home.  I guess that is one of my  guilty pleasures in life...I hope you find something that moves you...

The Book Ciritics

I know this may be hard to believe but I have had my share of haters and judgers over the years and still do.

I use to let it bother me a whole lot.  I don't know why I had this need to fix every problem I encountered and why I took every jab at me so personally.

I guess I thought people online were real and real people usually have reasons for doing what they do.

I have discovered that not all people online are real but they are just characters made up by the real people online.  It makes the idea of an online world more like an interactive novel that can never be predicted.  I have learned that you can't apply logic to this illogical world.

It explains why the online bullies are probably the ones getting bullied in real life.  The social butterflies are probably really socially awkward and the smooth talkers probably hold their tongues.

You have to remember you medium.  The internet allows you to be anything or anyone you like. Haters and judgers are out there only to show your true colors or to satisfy their own needs through your despair.  They are not your friends and could care less what happens to you.  It is just their sick game.

People online are never who you think they are...well most of them.  There are a small amount of people who are genuine and real but they are a rare find.  I hope you find someone real and genuine online if that is what you are looking for...

Am I real? Some would say no but really only you can decide that...

Why am I here?  It is a place that I do find interesting as I would a good book.  It is like a diner at the end of the road...no telling who will end up there but every time you go it's a new adventure...

To survive in this world you have to have a "trust no one "belief system, and for some that is not a way to live.  That is why you can't really live in an online world.  It is just a place to visit and grab a cup of tea and a muffin~

The Differences

You know men and women are very different and I am talking about more than just looking in the mirror.  I believe our whole approach to life is different.  I am not here to say which is better just that they are divergent.

I have spent a lot of time observing my counterparts and these are some of my conclusions.  Men pretty much say what they mean.  Their isn't hidden meaning in their words when they say it's over, by George they mean it's over.  Women on the other hand are tied to emotions.  We connect our experiences to feelings. We are not sure it's over because it doesn't feel like it.

I am convinced that men and women will never be on the same page in life.  We are just not wired the same way.  How we behave has be carefully formed throughout  our lives.  Girls are treated with kid gloves and asked about how they feel whereas boys are told to man up and called weak if they show emotions like fear or pain.

My favorite example to show how the sexes are unalike is shopping.  If you need a red shirt this is how each sex will get it.
 Men will go to the mall find a store, hone in on the shirt section, locate the right size and color and purchase it~ Boom...tracked, shot, and killed~ Hunting of the red shirt took what, all of 10 minutes.

 Women will go to the mall with a friend (or man that wants to please his woman), find the said red shirt~ and try it on, asking ~ how does this make me feel and will not buy a shirt until it feels right~ this could take many hours and the opinion of said friend is imperative to purchase~ hence 3 hour tour for one shirt~

 Knowing we are different means that we can't change each other but we should simply celebrate who we are...

Take a Bow

I know I have said this before...I write for me and me alone.  I am not looking for your approval of the content of my posts.

I post here simply because I love to write and I love to share my ideas.

Don't get me wrong, I am happy you stopped by to carve out some time with me.

I want to thank you for reading my words.  I hope you have been moved one way or another~I really just want to evoke feelings from you...

After sharing my writings, I guess you are a part of me now, for you have seen a glimpse of who I am and who I want to be.

I am not asking for anything in return.  I just want to thank you my friend..take a bow...

The Dream

My day was long and taxing and all I wanted to do was take a hot bath and wash off its residue.  The hot water lured me to sleep and I soon drifted into a whole new world where I was the spectator.

I watch the story unfold before my eyes...a young girl finding love and a terrible accident that drew her away from the world that she knew...I woke up suddenly with tear-stained eyes. It was as though I had been there in living flesh.   It was so real that it took me a bit to realize it was only a dream and I was still soaking in my warm water bath.  

I was determined to hold on to those thoughts and feeling.  After my bath, I starting writing them down. Before long, seven pages had emerged and there was still so much more to say...

I realized that when I close my eyes tonight that I will travel to another world to be a spectator once again and I cannot wait for another adventure...

Crisp Air

There is a crisp chill in the air tonight.  Enough to make you shiver and reach for something or someone warm wrap up in.

I guess this is my wake up call to the true end of summer.  I am a little saddened but I am looking forward to the cool days ahead.

I like when the temperature outside is chilly and the inside is toasty-warm.  It is the perfect time for hot tea, homemade soups and baking.

I love to bake.  There is just something satisfying about the lingering smells of freshly baked breads and sweet treats.  It is the best decoration for the holidays.

So, kick off that hard day and cuddle up with me on the sofa and let's enjoy the crispness of this cold night together...

Dressing Up

I am sitting here staring at the contents of my closet and I realize I have nothing to wear.  I know that buying something new isn't the solution I am seeking. How can that be???

I know that my lack of finding something appropriate doesn't have to do with either the quantity or the quality of articles in my wardrobe.

I just don't feel that pit-in-my-stomach excitement that I use to conjure up when I wrapped myself in something stylish and/or smart.

I miss the playtime and fantasy connection of my wardrobe and I think it is time for an adventure.  It is time to mix and match sophisticated and sexy and see where it takes me this weekend.

I am pulling out the corset and long gloves and I am not sure where the hemline will stop but I know it will be the perfect marriage of naughty and nice...

I am willing to take the risk...of fashion for the chance of having a good time...you are defiantly invited to witness the freeing of my fun!

Enlightened

I saw the light in the distance and headed toward it, turning my back on the darkness that surrounded me.

I made it and I can't believe that I spent so much energy worrying about everything and fearing the unknown.

I am better than I thought I could be and stronger than I ever gave myself credit for.  I can laugh at how foolish I was for fearing the unknown.

I am in the safety of my thoughts now and I am not quite myself and I am not sure I will ever be the same person that left this morning a wreck.

I do know that the little things in life make us grow and doing this we mature.  I wish you best and I hope you are growing and getting stronger with me....

Into the darkness

My mood is a little dark today because I am facing a fear of mine.

I don't know what it is about hearing it is just a routine or little minor surgery that puts me on edge.
 
My mind tells me I am ridiculous and there is nothing to worry about but my body doesn't listen to the calming words.

I know I will end up working myself into a frenzy and my anxiety level will be through the roof and the worse part is that I know it is all in my head.

It is time for me to sleep my unnatural slumber and when I awake all this fear will seem just like a distant dream...

Pinch Me!

I am meeting really interesting people in chat lately.  For the most part, they seem to be so mature and down to earth at times that I have to pinch myself.

Don't get me wrong, I am not saying that I am going to jump on the chat drama bandwagon again.  I am just enjoying the pleasant surprise that I am finding there right now.  People always seem to surprise you.

I have always put my faith in the wrong people and always end up getting burned but I stand before you now somewhat fireproof.  I am trying to step through life with my eyes wide open and I plan on enjoying the picturesque scenes around me.  I raise my glass~ bottoms up! See you on the flip-side...

Time

The other day someone brought up the subject of a clock.

Can you hear the mocking tick tock as your seconds are lost?

This really makes you think...where does the time go?  What do you spend your seconds on?

Over the years, as I look back on my multitude of seconds passed, I have to wonder if I used them wisely to better the person I have become.

I guess I realized I was losing a lot of time in chat and wrapped up with chat drama.  Those seconds are gone and I can't get them back.  I don't regret my time in chat.  I only regret staying there so long.

I have tried to limit my time there because I will always enjoy meeting new people online and reminiscing with old friends but I have things to do.

I now focus my time on other things...things that make me a better person...things that don't make me watch my seconds depart with feelings of regret...things that make me happy and make my time worthwhile...

Never Forget

I remember that day thirteen years ago when  I watched the adults around me move through the day in sadden silence.  I knew something big happened.  I watched the news broadcasts over and over again with the arms of my family wrapped around me in protective sympathy.

I remember how numb I felt waking up the next day, trying to get though it one moment at a time.  So many things have changed since 2,977 lives were expunged from our world.

Our sense of security has been shaken and civil rights have been trampled on in the name of vengeance.  We are still fighting a war that seems to have no end.  We are more divided now then we were back then.

There is still something, something I remember so strongly it emerged from in the bowels of that horrific tragedy  and let a glimmer of goodness begin to shine.   It was the coming together as a nation..the goodness in people that encompassed our broken world.

It was the strength that brought us back and made are hearts heal.  I still remember that fretful day but I also remember from great tragedy good is born....never forget

Colorless

I use to close my eyes and dream in brilliant colors. I loved to watch the story lines and follow the characters in whatever unseemly adventure I had in store for them.

But lately, I have noticed that the color has faded from my dreams and I have been missing parts of the adventure.  I only see glimpses of places and faces wrapped in shadows.

Where are they going?  I worry about the loss and I truly miss the stories.  What is happening to me?  Why are they leaving me...?  I only hope to see the color again soon...I sure do miss the brilliance.

Celebration

Today, I realized I am happy.  I am not bogged down in the craziness of the world.

 I am just enjoying being who I am.  I guess that is what growing up is all about.  I have found people in my life who get who I am and are not trying to change me.

I am content with who I have become and I can only hope that I stay on this giddy path.

I use to care so much about what other people thought but I have learned that it is my thoughts about myself that are the most important.

I guess being happy has made me a selfish person but I am tired of being politically correct and miserable.

Welcome to the birth of my understand of myself...celebrate with me my friends...

Convergence

I haven't been to chat in awhile and I had a little time yesterday so I decided to pop in and see what was going on.

I was happy to see a few familiar faces and I enjoyed a pretty interesting conversation about aliens, war, elections, space and BBQ.

I forgot how much I enjoyed exchanging ideas and bouncing silly notions around.  It was a definite high and I do miss it.

I am so afraid of getting swept into the addiction of chat that I think I stay away too much.

I am sure I can find the balance between real life and my online world...I just have to trend lightly.

Bombarding

As I search for the state of the union, I notice that it's focus is on the bad things so I have stopped watching the news.

 It is not like I am not informed about the events in the world but I have eliminated the constant bombarding of negative information.  I know bad things happen but I believe you can focus on the good.

  I guess this makes me a little delusional but I like to think this world is full of more positive things.  We deal with enough tragedy on a regular basis.

 I guess I am putting on rose-colored glasses tinted in positive optimism in the hopes that one in time things will be better...

Music Maddness

No matter how crazy your day was today, something happens when put on a pair of headphones and plug into a really good song.

 There is just something magical about listening to the right song...the sway of your hips to the beat.  

The world that comes into focus as you close your eyes and imagine the notes all around you.  

It's a happy place where you can play...

I have been turning up the beat more and more lately and really enjoying myself.  

I challenge you to find a song that makes you feel that way..

Summertime

During summertime, I am able to jump off the fast-moving train that I call my life, barrel roll and relax.

It is a time to breathe deeply, walk in slow motion and recharge.

 It is a time to notice the flowers growing in the garden, the birds and squirrels playing in the street, and the stars glowing in darkened sky.

It is a time to let my imagination climb into the clouds and reach out to find a hidden treasure.

It is a time to capture my thoughts in writing and spend time chatting with friends.

I do enjoy the summertime.

Hail to the Clowns!

Political campaigning is really turning into a circus.

You have your illusionist trying to keep your focus on everything except what he is truly about. 

 There is dog and pony show from "groups" supporting a candidate and their only goal is to make the opponent look bad without dragging their candidate in to show. 

 There are clowns that try to make bad situations look good by masking them with laughter.  

There are dancing bears who move rhythmically,  spinning around the dance floor until your feel as though you are  spinning with them in a discombobulated trance and the high-flyers who make everything look one way but they hide the truth behind the trick.  

After watching the show, I feel pretty entertained but who wants a bunch of circus performers calling the shots in the government?  

Who do you believe?

Everyone wants you to see things their way.  No matter what,  you always have someone telling you why you should think this way or that way.

I wonder why it is so important for everyone to see eye to eye or be on the same page all the time. Can't we all agree to just disagree.

I am no exception to this because I know I like to be right.  I guess in my mind I am always right and when you can't see that, I will spend a lot of time trying to convince you why you should see that I am right.

I don't know why it is so important to me and where does being "right" all the time get me...never where I want to be.

I have to learn to be a better listener and to except that everyone doesn't see things my way and that is ok...come on, you know I am right about this...

Time to Serve

I spent my whole life surrounded by the military way of life because of my father.

His whole career was spent keeping us safe even if he didn't know it.  He fought battles to tragic to even talk about.

I know because I saw the pain in his eyes when I would ask and he could not answer.

I am lucky I know because every time my dad left he came back to me.  I think about those who never returned or those still fighting.

Ask yourself what you can do to make things a little better for a family in pain this Memorial Day...

A Note

I found myself in front of the computer and I decided to write a note.  I have no idea where I am going with this but I just thought I would give it a whirl.  

Do you believe in life after death?  I have asked myself that a lot lately.

I guess it came from reading the book "Heaven is for Real" and the recent passing of someone very close to me.  I have been thinking about this a lot lately.

 I believe there is something more...something you have to have faith in.  I can't explain but it is a feeling I get.  I believe people who pass send us messages to help. The messages are things in daily life that spark memories and make you feel good or help you get through something tough.  

They are small things that would go unnoticed most days, like a Cardinal perched on a bench or a butterfly on a windowsill.  I am truly sorry for your loss and I won't even start to pretend to know what you have been going through.  I can only say that I am sorry and at the end of the day I know it is not a lot.  I hope you find peace and remember...

Stormy Times

This Spring started out with a pounding of wet droplets, leaving the bright sky hidden behind gray billowy curtains.  I thought I would lose my mind tucked within walls that held me.

As nothing lasts forever, the warmth of the light finally emerged and I was able to step outside of my prison to clear my thoughts.

When you stop and look, there are so many things that you see.  Birds always catch my eye first, adorned with such brilliant colors.

 The crimson, jade, and sapphire sparkle in the morning grass buffet while many curious bystanders ogle their performance.

I take it all in and breathe.  I don't mind the rain but I do miss the sun...

Web of Words

I have missed our time together.  I know I have been neglecting my time online for awhile now and wrapped up in that neglected world is my writing. 

Words use to flow from my fingertips as I wrote about us and now they are stagnant.  It isn't the lack of topics but the loss of desire.  I am not sure I want to go back to the way things were...but I do feel a loss.

Maybe I have forgotten the magic of my fingers stroking across the keyboard in thought and before long my written desires painted in printed characters for all the world to gaze upon.

I don't really believe the whole world is watching me but you never know who is going to tumble down into your web of words.  I can only promise I will write when I feel the tug of desire again...

Rainy Daze

I am always amazed by the amount of time I lived online.  I look back now and I wonder what I could have accomplished without the hours, days, months, and years tied up to my computer.  I am not saying that I regret my time or that I would change it.

I just ponder at the moments lost in the real world and what my online life accomplished for me.  I lived hard online and I tried to be myself but over the years I stopped recognizing myself and I had alienated all my friends and family.  I guess you can say I was living in a world I could control instead of one I could not.

My online life was as real to me as the one I took my first breaths in and I felt I was always showing the real me.  I guess you can't be who you are while you are locked away.  I resisted for a long time but I have finally been able to see myself clearly and the reflection makes me smile.

Enjoy your life...live hard and love harder....but to experience the rain...you must get wet!

Journey Within

I have found the warmth in life I have been looking for lately.  It keeps my mind and body alive and content.

How did I manage to find this place?
I looked within myself and realized that I had it all along. I guess I had given up the journey and was lost for a bit.   It didn't hurt that I found a partner to help me search.

I look forward to the new year and all the new adventures it may bring...